Mess causes Stress

The dangerous “I might need this” excuse

January 9, 2013

Triumph! All the old magazines are gone!! I hadn’t even looked at them since I placed them in special binders, thinking how organized I was.

And I tossed (unseen) all of my audio cassettes. I just saved one that my grandmother spoke on. That is a treasure for me. Better grab a handful of tissues before I listen to that.

I have given lots of clothes to the needy, toys to my students, books and office stuff to schools. If I donate, I feel better than if I just toss.

And, even though I don’t earn lots of money, Amazon is an easy place to sell my books. It is a no-brainer.

My cleaning lady manages much better now. Not having to lift tons of junk off every surface saves cleaning time. I give her a lot of stuff, too. She is used to cleaning it!

I have decided to sell a vintage Sunbonnet Sue quilt as well as three lovely carpets. One of them is silk and I lugged the thing back from Morocco. Still…

My walk-in closet has gone from being a “stumble-in” to an organized storage room for my clothes, shoes and purses. Nonetheless, I need to purge quite a bit more.

I was thinking about all the (dumb) reasons, er, ah, oh well, EXCUSES (THERE! I’ve said it.) I’ve used to avoid confronting my stuff. Some of my best ones are:

“I might need it”

“It was expensive”

“I’ll surely have time for this project one day”

“I don’t have the time right now”

“I am too stressed”

“It could be important”

“My house/flat/hut is just too small”

“But it belonged to my Mom/Dad/Aunt/pet dog!”

“My husband/wife is a pack rat”

?????

It is not the stuff itself but how we think about our stuff that causes problems.

I used things to prove that I’d “made it”, especially after my separation. During my marriage, I had the feeling my husband was the more important one. I used all my earnings to buy things for the kids, the house and even shirts for my husband. See everyone, I am important too because I pay for the household things.

After I had separated and my husband ‘couldn’t remember’ my contributions, I subconsciously wanted to show the world that I could start from scratch and become financially independent. The material proof of that was my stuff. Lots of it.

Now, after being separated for twenty years, I don’t need to prove myself. I probably never did.

Why does mess lead to stress? 

1) Clutter bombards our minds with excessive stimuli (visual, olfactory, tactile), causing our senses to work overtime on stimuli that aren't necessary or important.
2) Clutter distracts us by drawing our attention away from what our focus should be on.
3) Clutter makes it more difficult to relax, both physically and mentally.
4) Clutter constantly signals to our brains that our work is never done.
5) Clutter makes us anxious because we're never sure what it's going to take to get through to the bottom of the pile.
6) Clutter creates feelings of guilt ("I should be more organized") and embarrassment, especially when others unexpectedly drop by our homes or work spaces. 
7) Clutter inhibits creativity and productivity by invading the open spaces that allow most people to think, brain storm, and problem solve.
8) Clutter frustrates us by preventing us from locating what we need quickly (e.g. files and paperwork lost in the "pile" or keys swallowed up by the clutter). Even just 5 minutes a day of time wasted dealing with clutter adds up to over 30 hours a year!!

"Storing" things on open shelves, on top of your desk or on tables does not remove visual stimuli that create stress and lessen the amount of open space that your mind "sees." Studies have shown that clutter is confusing to the brain and demands „processing“ energy. Clutter is an energy-drain. According to the principles of Feng Shui, clutter drains you of your positive energy. You can actually feel it.

De-clutter your primary work space before you leave it. It's normal to pull things out while you're working in a space, but make a habit of cleaning off your work space before you go. Not only will this give you a sense of closure when you leave, it will also make you feel good when you return to a nice, clean space. 

Only 25 percent of garages have enough room to store cars , according to a new book called 'Life at Home in the 21st Century'.

Of the 32 middle-class families from Los Angeles who were studied for the book, only one-quarter could use their garage to store their cars since they were so packed with unused junk.

“I would say absolutely, the problem of clutter has gotten much worse,” said Jean Arnold, an anthropologist at the University of California, Los Angeles, and co-author of the book. “We suddenly have 30 rolls of paper towels taking up space where bikes should be in the garage.”

And that phenomenon has led to increases in our levels of stress hormones. Arnold’s team of researchers had mothers walk around their homes with video cameras describing various rooms, and they also measured the women’s stress hormone levels. Mothers who described their home offices, bedrooms, and pantries as “complete disaster zones” had higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol than those who identified their spaces as restful and spacious.

“We were able to identify a troubling health trend,” said Arnold. “The physiological stress that occurs among women who see their homes as cluttered may have some long-term health consequences.”

The very act of deciding what to throw out and what to retain can be extremely anxiety-provoking for the 2 to 4 percent of American adults who have hoarding disorder -- they can have ceiling-high piles of everyday stuff like newspapers, junk mail, and old clothes. A brain imaging study published this week in the Archives of General Psychiatry found that individuals with this diagnosis experienced hyperactivity in certain brain regions responsible for decision-making whenever they had to decide which possessions to discard.

Those without hoarding disorder had far lower levels of brain activation in these regions and hence, had an easier time determining what stuff to trash. (So, more than 95 percent of us have no excuse.)

So what’s holding us back? Perhaps feeling overwhelmed about where to start. Peter Walsh, a professional organizer and author of It’s All Too Much, provides a great game plan.

1. Instead of focusing on stuff, determine what you want from a particular room. “From that point on,” said Walsh, “ask yourself whether the items in this room help you create that vision.” If you want your bedroom to be a room of intimacy, tranquility, and restfulness, the computer and desk filled with bills don’t belong there.

2. Create clear zones of what you want in a particular space. “If it’s an office, zones may be your work space, library area for book storage, and an area for kids to do their homework,” said Walsh. If you have these zones, you’ll be able to set clear limits. If this book shelf is where books live, you can’t put toys on it. “And if it’s designed to hold 100 books, and you have 101, you need to get rid of one.”

3. When you bring a new object into the house, follow the one-in, one-out rule. Buy a new pair of shoes? Get rid of an old pair. Ditto for cellphones, toys, and laptops. 

4. Always finish the cycle. Just as a wash left for three days in the machine will stink when the clothes are finally moved to the dryer, your house will take on the “odor” of clutter if you interrupt your organization midcycle by throwing the mail on the kitchen counter to sort through later or leaving dirty dishes in the sink. “The moment you use the word "later", you’ve lost the battle,” said Walsh.

5. Try the trash bag tango. Get everyone in the house to grab two trash bags -- one for stuff to throw out or recycle such as old mail, food containers, and newspapers, and one for stuff to donate. Set a kitchen timer for 10 minutes and attack a room. Making a game of it will make it feel less like a chore.

6. Take advantage of tax deductions for motivation. Here’s an easy way to figure out where to donate all the stuff you’re getting rid of: Google the word “donate” along with the object you’d like to donate and the city you’re in to get a full list of organizations willing to take the used hubcaps or old TV off your hands.