How do we tell the difference between acquiring the necessary disciplinary muscles to achieve our goals from being stuck in a rut? We get quiet and we listen. To ourselves. To our work. And we especially listen to our heart.
Part of what we’re listening for is what the stuckness feels like. Is it the kind of stuck where there is a sense of determination and accomplishment that comes with acquiring new, albeit difficult, skills? Of stretching ourselves out past our comfort zone? Or little by little chipping away at that block of marble?
Or perhaps the stuckness is more like being in an endless loop? The kind of stuck that fills you with despair or a sense of futility—as if you will never move forward again. Often that sort of stuckness is accompanied by discouragement, anger, and despair. But some of us are so tied to our sense of discipline that we consider it a weakness to even name those feelings.
But those feelings are really a signpost telling us to slow down for a bit and consider our true direction. And maybe take a left turn instead of continuing to slog down a futile path. If we keep beating our head against the same problem over and over, then our work on that issue isn’t finished yet.
If you’re doing everything right over and over and still nothing is happening—then maybe it’s time to do something else. Break a rule. Or three. Step outside your own process. Stir up your creativity a bit.
If you’d never dream of proceeding without your plan clutched tightly in your hand, consider leaping into the mist and see what turns up. If you’re a person who loves to wing it, try a detailed plan, just for the hell of it.
If you keep wishing and dreaming and visualizing, but that great big honkin’ dream you are longing for still hasn’t shown up, maybe it’s time to practice letting go of that particular thing. Shift your energy to a new goal—one you can actually control—or perhaps even a non-goal. Instead, focus on the process.
If you’ve spent years cultivating a legion of FB followers, LinkedIn contacts and Twitter disciples yet your career still isn’t where you want it to be, maybe it’s time to concentrate on a different way of growing your career. Close the door for a while. Turn inward instead. Let yourself get bored, let things get quiet enough that you can hear the previously unheard voices in your head.
If you give and give and give and it still feels like it’s never enough, then maybe it’s time to stop giving. Maybe the life lesson there isn’t about giving until you’re empty, but about learning how to draw healthy boundaries.
If you walk around the world in a protective shell, experiment with taking that shell off—even if for only a few moments at a time.
If you’re consuming hundreds of articles and essays and how-to’s each month, maybe it’s time to put a moratorium on that sheer avalanche of information and go inward and let your mind be still. Sometimes, knowing too much can be just as paralyzing as not knowing enough.
Our best ideas and epiphanies often spring from the swampy places in our being. We may think we’re dying of boredom or stagnation, but that sense of boredom is a necessary part of the birth of new ideas. And selves. Long stretches of mental quiet, the freedom and privacy to make mistakes, recover, and then make new ones, is all part of the process.
Learning to regroup and trying new approaches are as much a part of the journey as mastering some newfangled technique.
Sometimes creativity likes to be shaken up. Turned upside down. It needs a gust of fresh air every so often. I’ve learned just how important it is to take a radical left turn every once in a while, even though it feels awkward, even unpleasant. You might be astounded at what new truths you’ll discover about the world and your own work.
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
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