Mindfulness - The 12 "Laws"

“Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.”
– Carl Jung

Mindfulness as a daily ritual is the ultimate challenge and practice.  It’s a way of living, of being, of seeing, of tapping into the full power of your humanity.
At its core, mindfulness is…

• Being aware of what’s happening in the present moment without wishing it were different
• Enjoying each pleasant experience without holding on when it changes (which it will)
• Being with each unpleasant experience without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t)

Knowing this is important.  Living every day in such a way that makes mindfulness possible is life-changing.  Here are twelve basic laws of (practical) mindfulness that make mindful living a gradual reality:

1.  Your only reality is THIS MOMENT, right here, right now.

• The secret to health for the mind, body and soul is not to mourn the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment mindfully and purposefully.
• True wealth is the ability to experience the present moment fully.  No other time and place is real.  Lifelong peace and abundance is found in such simple awareness.

2.  A negative thought is harmless unless you believe it.

• It’s not your thoughts, but your attachment to your thoughts, that causes suffering.
• Attaching to a thought means believing that it’s true without proof.  A belief is a thought that you’ve been attaching to, often for years.

3.  You will not be punished FOR your anger; you will be punished BY it.

• Speak and act when you are enraged, and you will make the best speech and motions you will ever regret.
• Being angry and unhappy about something is easy.  Doing something productive about it is the hard and worthwhile part.  Life is too precious and too short to spend it being upset.  Drop it. 

4.  Inner peace is knowing how to belong to oneself, without external validation.

• In order to understand the world, you have to turn away from it on occasion.
• Sometimes you justify yourself to others when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts.  Don’t look for anyone else to give you permission to be yourself.  You don’t need anyone’s validation to be happy or to live a good life.

5.  Everything is created twice, first in your mind and then in your life.

• If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for almost anything.
• Keep your morals close to your heart and at the top of your mind.

6.  There is a wilderness you walk alone, however well accompanied you are.

• Others can walk beside you, but they can’t walk in your shoes.
• Try to figure out why you truly are always alone even when you’re surrounded, and why this is perfectly OK.

7.  To strongly believe in something, and not live it, is dishonest.

• Don’t bend; don’t water down your dreams; don’t try to make every feeling logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion trends.  Rather, follow your most intense passions, mindfully.
• Characterize yourself by your actions and you will never be fooled by other people’s words.

8.  The right path and the easy path are rarely the same path.

• You will ultimately come to realize that the struggle is not found on the path, it is the path, and it’s worth your while.  Every step forward may be tough, but will feel better than anything else you can imagine.
• People don’t stop pursuing their dreams and passions because they grow old; they grow old because they stop pursuing their dreams and passions.

9.  If you want the benefits of something in life, you have to also want the costs.

• Instead of thinking about what you want, first consider what you are willing to give up to get it.  You can’t have the destination without the journey.  If you want the six-pack abs, you have to want the sweat, the sore muscles, the early mornings at the gym, and the healthy meals.
• Ask yourself: What is worth suffering for?  If you find yourself wanting something month after month, year after year, yet nothing happens and you never come any closer to it, then maybe you don’t actually want it at all, because you’re not willing to suffer though the work it’s going to take to achieve it.

10.  Overcommitting is the antithesis of living a peaceful, mindful life.

• There’s a difference between being committed to the right things and being overcommitted to everything.  It’s tempting to fill in every waking minute of the day with to-do list tasks or distractions.  Don’t do this to yourself.  Leave space.
• Keep your life ordered and your schedule under-booked. Create a foundation with a soft place to land, a wide margin of error, and room to think and breathe.

11.  When you try to control too much, you enjoy too little.

• Don’t live a life packed full of concrete plans.  Work hard, but be flexible.  The best moments often happen unplanned and the greatest regrets happen by not reaching exactly what was planned.
• Sometimes you just need to let go, relax, take a deep breath and love what is, right now.

12.  When you are tired, you are attacked by ideas you likely conquered long ago.

• You must refill your bucket on a regular basis.  That means catching your breath, finding quiet solitude, focusing your attention inward, and otherwise making time for recovery from the chaos of your routine.
• It’s perfectly healthy to pause and let the world spin without you for a while.  If you don’t, you will burn yourself out.

Afterthoughts

The greatest enemy of good thinking, and thus mindfulness, is busyness.
Busyness isn’t a virtue, nor is it something to respect.  We all have seasons of wild schedules, but very few of us have a legitimate need to be busy ALL the time.  We simply don’t know how to live within our means, prioritize properly, and say no when we should.
Although being busy can make us feel more alive than anything else for a moment, the sensation is not sustainable long term.  We will inevitably, whether tomorrow or on our deathbed, come to wish that we spent less time in the buzz of busyness and more time actually living a purposeful, mindful life.


Source:

Marc Chernoff Co-Founder @ Marc and Angel Hack Life / Personal Development...

airbnb for me

I joined airbnb spontaneously in July, looking for a room for two weeks in October in Florence, Italy. Some of the places looked great, actually amazing, on the website airbnb.com.  But some rooms were hardly larger than broom closets!

I began to wonder if anyone would come over to my town to sleep in a private room of mine. Maybe if the trade fairs in Düsseldorf drew so many people, the hotels would fill up and visitors might need sleeping places.

So I inserted my own ad: a spacious bedroom with half-bath plus shower use. I spruced up the room and took some pictures. And off I went on a new adventure.

Within 24 hours I had an inquiry, which surprised me considerably. Weird thoughts raced through my head and fears crept into my bones.

Then I thought “Why not?!” and said yes.

It’s been over a month since I had my first guest and have had five guests since then and two more have signed up. Would you believe it? It’s lovely!

The guests are quiet, orderly and delightful people. Except for the fact that I’ve been sleeping on the floor of my office, the whole experience has been pleasant up ‘til now. Sometimes they’ll chat but more often than not, they go their own way and just sleep here.

Fine with me!

So I’m in the process of turning my office into a bedroom for myself when I have guests. The room is also quite large so it works out fine. I had bought a fold-up bed on wheels years ago, which my daughter had borrowed. Last year, I loaned the mattress to my son and it’s taken a while to get both parts back together and in my office. But it’s finished and I do sleep better on a mattress with a support!

If the guests come close together, I end up doing lots of laundry: sheets and towels. Since I don't have a dryer (saving energy), I have to hang the sheets over doors and on the balcony if it's not raining, etc. And I keep the bath spotlessly clean, which takes more time than before. It definitely makes me more orderly!

When asked why I let “strange” people stay here, I can’t really answer. My motto has always been “Why not?!” and "Just Do It!" which makes for a more colorful life.

If I can’t wear a size 6, am I fat?!

Whazup with me today?! I cleaned windows, purged my closets, went to training, ate correctly, read a (Kindle) book …

What IS going on?! I must have taken an energy pill.

I haven’t given up my mission – the pursuit of simplicity. Not too much of any THING yet lots of quality life.

So I am purging for the umteenth time since 2012. I still have many “things” I don’t “need” but I have gotten rid of all the unimportant STUFF.

Trying on the pants I was deciding if I should keep or give to the refugees who are filling up Europe, I found a “few” that were much too small. Now how did that happen?! Those were size 6 pants and my rear is a size ???!

Could it be the muscles I’ve grown through disciplined training? Did the pants shrink in the dry cleaning? Did irksome elves exchange my pants with those of their colleagues?

As an older person, I’ve learned that we need more fat in case we get sick. Could that be an adage from the 15^th century?

So maybe I should stop eating. Mama always said that is the guaranteed way to lose weight.

Or perhaps I should just roll with the flow and accept my Venus curves. My doctor says I am just right but what does he know?! Doesn’t he see the magazines, newspapers, TV shows? That’s the way we need to look, right?

At any rate, I shall not give up. I still work and love it. I like my new pad. I have some new friends and have warmed up some old ones. I can still move with some ease and my apartment is ideally located. The fitness center is close and, if I walk there, I get an “award” from my fitbit.

So, who’s complainin’?!