Perfect Self-Management in 52 Weeks – Meditation 101

Perfect Self-Management in 52 Weeks – Meditation 101

So now that I’ve finished my personal „Eat, Pray, Love“, I have a few tips for meditation beginners.

First of all, meditation isn’t necessarily the main street toward bliss. Most people try to meditate and are disappointed.

I like to think of it as a possibility to widen the pauses between mental chatter outbreaks. And what does that do for us? This gives us mental calm which is a beautiful way to reduce stress.

Meditation helps you to grow your own intuitive faculty. It becomes very clear what is going to fulfill you, what is going to help you flower. - Osho

Life can get a little insane at times.  The crazy pace and demands we face on a daily basis often leave us feeling stressed, overworked, tired and even unhappy.  Meditation is a simple, effective and convenient way to calm your busy mind, relax your body, become grounded and find inner peace amidst the chaos of day-to-day life.

Benefits of meditation

If relaxation is not the goal of meditation, it is often one result of it. Back in the 1970s, Herbert Benson, MD, a researcher at Harvard University Medical School, coined the term the relaxation response after conducting research on people who practiced transcendental meditation. The relaxation response, in Benson’s words, is “an opposite, involuntary response that causes a reduction in the activity of the sympathetic nervous system.”

Since then, studies on the relaxation response have documented the following short-term benefits to the nervous system:

• lower blood pressure
• improved blood circulation
• lower heart rate
• less perspiration
• slower respiratory rate
• less anxiety
• lower blood cortisol levels
• more feelings of well-being
• less stress
• deeper relaxation

Contemporary researchers are now exploring whether consistent meditation practice yields long-term benefits, and noting positive effects on brain and immune function among meditators. Yet it is worth repeating that the purpose of meditation is not to achieve benefits. To put it as an Eastern philosopher might say, the goal of meditation is no goal. It is simply to be present.

In Buddhist philosophy, the ultimate benefit of meditation is liberation of the mind from attachment to things it cannot control, such as external circumstances or strong internal emotions. The liberated, or “enlightened,” practitioner no longer needlessly follows desires or clings to experiences, but instead maintains a calmness of mind and sense of inner balance.

In India, I found that sitting in a lotus position for half an hour was a sure ticket to a dead foot! I was more aware of discomfort than able to concentrate on my breathing.

Here is a simple beginner’s guide to meditation:

1. Sit tall

The most common and accessible position for meditation is sitting.  Sit on the floor, in a chair or on a stool.  If you are seated on the floor it is often most comfortable to sit cross-legged on a cushion.  Comfort is key.  Now imagine a thread extending from the top of your head, pulling your back, neck and head straight up towards the ceiling in a straight line.  Sit tall but don’t cramp up. Sitting straight helps you breathe easier and more fully.

I actually sit with my back supported by a couch or wall, cushioned by a pillow. My personal favorite is having my legs stretched out yet sitting on a chair supported by the chair back and legs hanging down works nicely.

2. Relax your body

Close your eyes and scan your body, relaxing each body part one at a time.  Begin with your toes, feet, ankles, shins and continue to move up your entire body.  Relax your shoulders, neck, eyes, face, jaw and tongue which are all common areas for us to hold tension.

3. Be still and silent

Now that you are sitting tall and relaxed, take a moment to be still.  Just sit.  Be aware of your surroundings, your body, the sounds around you.  You don’t need to change or do anything.  Just be aware.

4. Breathe

Turn your attention to your breath.  Breathe silently, yet deeply.  Engage your diaphragm and fill your lungs, but do not force your breath.  Notice how your breath feels in your nose, throat, chest and belly as it flows in and out. I find it helpful to observe how the air flows cool through the nostrils on the inhalation and warmed up on the exhalation. Just observe the air flowing in... and out. Let your body take the lead on this. You don’t need to control anything.

5. Calm your mind

As you focus on your breath, your mind will begin to calm and become present.  This does not mean that thoughts will cease to arise.  As thoughts come to you, simply acknowledge them, set them aside, and return your attention to your breath.  Don’t dwell or embellish on your thoughts.  Some days your mind will be busy and filled with inner chatter, other days it will remain calm and focused.  Neither is good, nor bad. It just is.

There is no correct length of time to practice meditation, however when first beginning it is often easier to sit for shorter periods of time (5 to 10 minutes).  As you become more comfortable with your practice, meditate longer.  Set an alarm if you prefer to sit for a predetermined length of time. 

When you are ready to end your practice, slowing bring your conscious attention back to your surroundings.  Acknowledge your presence in the space around you.  Gently wiggle your fingers and toes.  Begin to move your hands, feet, arms and legs.  Open your eyes.  Move slowly and take your time getting up.

Day 1: Focus meditation

Find a quiet place, maybe even the toilet or an empty conference room at work, and get into a comfortable sitting position. A concentrative meditation technique you can try today involves focusing on a single point.

This could entail watching the breath, repeating a single word (maybe „relax“, „peace“, „love), staring at a candle flame, listening to a repetitive gong or counting beads on a rosary. Since focusing the mind is challenging, a beginner might meditate for only a few minutes. It’s all good. I find focussing on a candle quite pleasant.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfpLea9OurA

In this form of meditation, you simply refocus your awareness on the chosen object of attention each time you notice your mind wandering. Rather than pursuing random thoughts, you simply let them go. Through this process, your ability to concentrate improves.

Enjoy this time for as long as you want or have time for.

Day 2: Mindfulness meditation

Mindfulness meditation technique encourages you to observe wandering thoughts as they drift through the mind. The intention is not to get involved with the thoughts or to judge them, but simply to be aware of each mental note as it arises. Then let them go.

Through mindfulness meditation, you can see how your thoughts and feelings tend to move in particular patterns. Over time, you can become more aware of the human tendency to quickly judge experience as “good” or “bad” (“pleasant” or “unpleasant”). With practice, an inner balance develops.

Day 3: Walking meditation

Walking meditation is a way to practice moving without a goal or intention. Mindful walking simply means walking while being aware of each step and of our breath. It can be practiced anywhere, whether you are alone in nature or with others in a crowded city. You can even practice mindful breathing and walking meditation in between business appointments or in the parking lot of the supermarket.

Walking outside in nature is a joy. Yet even in a busy city we can enjoy mindful walking. Mindful walking allows us to be aware of the pleasure of walking. We can keep our steps slow, relaxed, and calm. There is no rush, no place to get to, no hurry. Mindful walking can release our sorrows and our worries and bring peace into our body and mind.

We can practice walking meditation alone, with another person, or with a group. Placing our footsteps one after the other slowly and in silence, we can create joy with each step.

Day 4: Writing meditation

Talking or writing about your feelings forces you to call them something. And one technique taught in mindfulness meditation is naming your emotions. It’s part of noticing and detaching from those emotions vs. letting them hijack your bliss. It’s about helping you to develop a pause button so you can observe emotions in a detached way.

Two UCLA studies showed “that simply labeling emotion promotes detachment,” says David Creswell, Ph.D., a meditation researcher at the university who joined colleague Matthew D. Lieberman, Ph.D., in heading up the studies.

Using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to record brain activity and pinpoint where in the brain it occurs, Lieberman’s team found that assigning names to negative emotions turns down the intensity of activity in the amygdala — an almond-sized sector of the brain that acts like an alarm system: When you witness a car crash, argue with your spouse or get yelled at by your boss, it’s your amygdala’s job to set off a cascade of stress-related reactions.

But if you simply name the distressing event, Lieberman says, you can wield more power over your amygdala’s freak-out. “When you attach the word ‘angry,’” he explains, “you see a decreased response in the amygdala.”

Creswell’s 2007 study supported these findings. His team asked 27 undergraduates to fill out a questionnaire on how “mindful” they were — how inclined they were to pay attention to present emotions, thoughts or sensations. They found a striking difference between the brains of those who called themselves mindful and those who didn’t: Mindful patients showed more activity in the areas that calm down emotional response, known as the prefrontal cortex; and less activation in the amygdala.

Take a few minutes to observe your feelings and emotions at the present moment. Without contemplating the reason for the feelings, just write down what you observe. Keep observing and writing for a few minutes or for as long as you need.

Day 5: breathing

1. Sit or lie comfortably.

2. Close your eyes.

3. Make no effort to control the breath; simply breathe naturally.

4. Focus your attention on the breath and on how the body moves with each inhalation and exhalation. Notice the movement of your body as you breathe. Observe your chest, shoulders, rib cage and belly. Make no effort to control your breath; simply focus your attention. If your mind wanders, simply return your focus back to your breath. Maintain this meditation practice for 2–3 minutes to start, and then try it for longer periods.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzzb3jHhgeU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67SeR3LxtdI

You can do this at work if you use earphones or earbuds.

I have a possibility to measure the oxygen saturation of my blood. Before I did so much yoga and meditation in India, I had about 98% and sometimes less. Now it is up to 99! I never breathed so much in my entire life as I did on my ayurveda trip!!

Now go have a mindful weekend!

 

This is a new year. A new beginning. And things will change.

Are you tired of dealing with the same type of headaches and heartaches over and over and over again?

Seriously, it’s time to purge some bad habits as we begin a New Year.  It’s time to learn from your mistakes rather than be conquered by them, and let your errors be of commission rather than omission.
Remember, you ultimately become what you repeatedly do.  If your habits aren’t helping you, they’re hurting you.  Here are 12 common examples of the latter:

1. Sticking exclusively with what you already know. – When you stop learning you stop living a meaningful life.  This is the truth.  Life’s richness does not come from always residing within familiar and comfortable territory.  It’s when you venture out, away from the familiar, that you grow stronger and more capable.  You must hold tightly to your core values while at the same time opening your heart and mind to new ideas, feelings and experiences.  Your own perspective will become clearer when you look at things from different angles.  Find ways to provide a healthy challenge to your current understanding of life, and you will discover and experience far more of life’s magic in the year ahead.
2. Resisting life’s inevitable and necessary changes. – There will always be more tough changes to make.  Always!  And yes, this growth can be unpleasant.  Change can be painful.  But in the end, nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you do not belong.  You’re not the same person you were a year ago, a month ago or a week ago.  You’re always growing.  Experiences don’t stop. It takes a great deal of courage to admit that something needs to change, and a lot more courage, still, to accept responsibility for making the change happen.  But doing so is worth every bit of effort you can muster.
3. Letting others define what’s possible for you and your life. – Some people will kill you over time if you let them; and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, seemingly harmless phrases like, “Be realistic.”  When this happens, close your ears and listen to your inner voice instead.  Remember that real success in life isn’t what others see, but how you feel inside.  It’s living your truth and doing what makes you feel alive.  There will come a time when your back is up against the wall and you’ll realize all you can do is say, “I’m sorry, I’m doing things my way this time!”  That’s the earth-shattering moment you start making progress on what’s truly important to YOU. And that’s when you can finally be happy and free.
4. Focusing on everyone’s story except your own. – Don’t be so satisfied with the success stories of others and how things have gone for them that you forget to write your own.  And don’t compare your Chapter 1 to someone else’s Chapter 15.  Unfold your own tale and bring it to life. If you want your life story to soar to new heights this year, you’ve got to clear a path, reduce the time-sinks and burdens weighing you down, and pick up the things that give you wings.  Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day.
5. Focusing on every little problem. – The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our attitudes, not our circumstances.  If you’re stressed out by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your interpretation of it; and this is something you have the power to change at any moment.  In other words, frustration and stress come from the way you react, not the way things are.  Adjust your attitude, and the frustration and stress is gone.
6. Wanting to be more right than everyone else. – When it’s suddenly more important to win arguments than to love people, we need to start all over again with our priorities.  Remember, truly confident people don’t mind being proven wrong.  They know that finding out what is right is a lot more important than being right.  And when they’re wrong, they’re secure enough to back down graciously and appreciate the lesson learned.  In fact, sometimes we must choose to be wrong, not because we really are wrong, but because we value our relationship more than our pride.  When two people who care about each other fight, both are wrong.  They have put some kind of superficial outcome over love and compromise.  The one who apologizes and makes up first is the one who is right.
7. Holding on to someone who continuously and deliberately hurts you. – Sometimes you have to walk away from people, not because you don’t care, but because they don’t.  Forgiveness is important, but when someone hurts you time and time again, purposely, you have to accept the fact that they don’t care about you. Do NOT strive to impress them anymore. 
8. Being more loving to others than you are to yourself. – Life gets a lot easier when you are your own best friend.  So don’t forget about YOU out there, and don’t be too hard on yourself either.  If you don’t take good care of yourself then you can’t take good care of anyone else.  Because we can’t give what we don’t have.  Treat yourself right and you’ll be life-giving to others.  And know that there’s a big difference between self-care and…
9. Being too self-absorbed. – Generosity is what keeps the things you own from owning you.  In other words, generosity isn’t just to help others, it’s also to liberate you.  Which is why you cannot live abundantly until you have done something nice for someone who can never repay you. There is no exercise better for your heart and mind than reaching down and lifting people up.
10. Expecting everyone else to be as kind and caring as you are. – Bottom line: You will end up very disappointed if you expect people will always do for you as you do for them. 
11. Expecting to never lose anything. – It’s incredibly tough to comprehend at times, but there’s a reason for everything. The awful pain of loss teaches humility to our prideful kind, has the power to warm-up a cold heart, and make an even better person out of a good one.  So remember that no book is just one chapter.  No chapter tells the whole story.  No hardship defines who you are.  Keep turning the pages that need to be turned.
12. Letting yesterday’s displeasures defeat you. – Don’t live with disappointment, live beyond it.  You cannot stop what has already happened, but you can let it make you stronger and more determined.  The journey to emotional maturity requires that you review the events in your life to find the wisdom and purpose they contain.  And a time will inevitably come in your life when you finally get it.  When in the midst of all your hesitation and frustration you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out, “ENOUGH!”  This is the turning point that ultimately leads to healing and growth.  So as we begin a new year, close the door on your past, open the door to your future, take a deep breath, take a step forward, and start a new chapter in your life.

 

9 Rules for Making Habits That Stick

Do you start each new year with lofty ambitions—only to end up in a rut six months later? It might be time to rethink your approach to resolutions.

  

Every year it seems we resolve to eat better, exercise more, lose ten pounds, stop stressing and start meditating. But while our intentions are good, our follow-through is often lacking. 

Research has found that after just six months, more than 50 percent of us have given up the goals we set in January. Not this time! Make different resolutions so you can set yourself up for success—all year long. 

Rule 1: You Must Stay True to You

Before you make a single change this year, Gretchen Rubin, author of the forthcoming book Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives, wants you to take one crucial step.  I'm a sucker for "before" and "after" photo shoots. The thought of a transformation—any kind of transformation—thrills me. So it should come as no surprise that at the beginning of a new year, right there with the rest of the world, I vow to make some changes. They range from the important (walk more) to the whimsical (wear perfume). With some of my goals, I've succeeded; with others, I've failed altogether. For the longest time, I couldn't pinpoint the reason for my erratic results. Did I need to be more focused? Was I just being lazy?  Turns out, I wasn't asking the right questions. As I discovered after spending several years researching a book on how we make and break habits, the problem isn't that we lack willpower or grit. The problem is this: We can't change until we know ourselves. That may sound obvious, but it's a step many of us skip as we make plans and set goals. We forget to think about us: what we like to do, what comes easily, what we can control. And so we fail because we try to change a habit in a way that doesn't suit us. Yet if we stop to identify key aspects of our nature, we can tailor a resolution to our particular idiosyncrasies and increase the likelihood we'll stick with our new plans.  I'll give you an example: A friend wanted to cook more. But even though she enjoyed spending time in the kitchen whipping up dishes, she couldn't get herself to do it. I asked her one simple question: "Have you ever successfully kept up this habit?" She had. When she'd lived with a roommate who loved to grocery shop, she cooked often. Revelation! It wasn't the cooking she minded; it was the shopping. Now she pays a little extra to have food delivered and finds that she has the time and energy to make meals at home.  But what if you're trying to make a change that doesn't come naturally? Say you're a person who wants to exercise, but you haven't found your way to the gym in decades. We've all heard the arguments in favor of exercising as soon as you wake up: Mornings are predictable; you can do it and be done; you'll enjoy the mood and energy boost all day. But while that might hold true for people who wake up with energy, the world is full of night owls who barely wake up in time for work. My owl sister runs on a treadmill at 10 P.M. after she puts her 4-year-old to bed. If she tried to get up at 6 A.M. to run, she'd fail every time.  The point is to figure out what works for you. Some people do better when they start small; others, when they start big. Some people need to be held accountable; some defy accountability. Some thrive when they give themselves an occasional break; others, when they never break the chain. (When I finally admitted that it was impossible for me to eat just one square of chocolate or one scoop of ice cream, I found that I actually found it easier to abstain from some sweets.)  As you read expert advice, ask yourself: Are parts of it likely to cause you physical discomfort, emotional uneasiness, irritation, or boredom? How can you make it appealing so it's easier to keep up? Can you avoid the things that will throw you off course? Many strategies work. You just have to discover the ones that are right for you. And remember, this isn't a race. There is no finish line. Find satisfaction in the doing, and you'll reap the greatest reward—a good habit that lasts forever. — Gretchen Rubin

Rule 2: There's Nothing Magical About January 1

Day 1 of the new year may seem the perfect time for a fresh start, but let's face it: After a season of indulgence, going cold turkey on anything is iffy at best. "It's hard to avoid temptation in January," says Oklahoma State University social psychologist Melissa Burkley, PhD. "There's usually too much food and alcohol left over from the holidays." Burkley's more realistic three-month plan can help you succeed: 

January: The Warm-Up   Too often, people fail to build in a prep period when they set goals. It's hard to, say, begin a successful diet if you haven't removed foods that may trigger you to overeat. Spending a week or two ramping up for a new behavior will signal to your brain, Hey, it's time to make a change! You should also use this time to write down your resolutions. February: The Starting Line   Now that you're prepared, get going! But instead of launching a new habit on a Monday, opt for the first Wednesday of the month. Mondays are inherently prone to long to-do lists and curveballs. By Wednesday, you'll be more settled in. Another bonus: Starting midweek may lead to greater success because three days is always easier than five. March and Beyond: Check-In   Don't forget to regularly review the goals you've set. Pick the same day each month to assess how things are going—are you getting closer to your goal? Have you plateaued? Are you moving backward? Keep in mind that most people will have many lapses on the way to lasting change, so be prepared to adjust as you go. — Arianna Davis

Rule 3: It's Not Your Butt—It's Your Brain

To develop a successful get-fit plan, you must override your brain's impulses. 

Think about how you've set weight loss goals in the past. Did you vow to hit the gym more, run a marathon, or start a weekly walking group with your friends, only to flake on your plans after a few weeks? "Many fitness and weight loss resolutions are intentions like balloons released into the air—they fade out of sight very quickly," says Walter Mischel, PhD, a professor of psychology at Columbia University and author of The Marshmallow Test: Mastering Self-Control. To see your way to success, Mischel says you first have to understand how the brain works.  The brain's "hot" part is the limbic system, which is reflexive, primitive, and immediate (useful in caveman days or to dodge a bullet), but it's also the "Gimme! Gimme!" part—the one that has you hitting the snooze button when you're supposed to get ready for the gym or agreeing to happy hour when you're scheduled for Zumba. To keep us from acting on all our desires, the brain is balanced with a rational and reflective "cool" system, located primarily in the prefrontal cortex, which developed later in the evolutionary process. When temptation strikes, the hot system activates and can lead to poor impulse control, says Mischel. But you can tap into your cool side to outsmart your knee-jerk response by coming up with if-then scenarios.  If you've heard and tried this approach before with little success, it's probably because your statements weren't specific enough. If you regularly skip the gym, tell yourself, "If I get off work at 6 p.m., I will put on my workout clothes and run one mile." Or, "If I'm going up only four flights, I'll take the stairs." Unlike a vague plan, which can easily be overruled by your hot system, a specific strategy can quickly bring your cool rational system into play—making you more likely to do the right thing. Several studies have shown that among groups with the same goals, participants who form if-then plans end up being more successful. 

  

In Data We Trust 

Here are stats from a sample of the 75 million users of MyFitnessPal, one of the most popular weight-loss tools worldwide, that show which strategies are most successful. 

30+ People who have lost 30-plus pounds are twice as likely to plan their meals and snacks ahead of time than those who have lost 5 pounds or less. 

3x That's how much more weight people lose when they share their food diary with friends (compared with those who keep their eating habits private). 

6+ 33 percent of people who have lost more than 40 pounds exercise at least six times per week.

Rule 4: Your Slipups Are Only Detours

You will give in to temptation—but that doesn't mean you should ditch your goal entirely. "Resilience doesn't come from willpower," says Barbara Fredrickson, PhD, director of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Lab at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. "It comes from thinking positively, which you can train yourself to do." 

The anatomy of a slipup—and how to get back on track. 

1. Moments before slipup Something happens to send you into a tailspin—you fight with your spouse, you receive a snippy email from a friend. You're ready to indulge in exactly the thing you've sworn off, like impulse shopping or junk food. "If these behaviors are associated with reward, your brain is wired to want the feel-good hit it's received in the past." 

2. During slipup Enjoy! Whether you're embarking on a little retail therapy or drowning your emotions in cheesecake, don't beat yourself up. "Slow down and appreciate it. Focus on the good feelings, not on the sense that you're failing." 

3. A few minutes after slipup How you talk to yourself in this moment often means the difference between moving on from your mistake and making it ten times worse. "Don't let yourself get sucked into screw-it syndrome—the idea that once you overindulge, you've ruined the day, so anything goes. Instead, say to yourself, "Yes, I got off track, but I don't need to make it worse." It's easier to dig out from a 300-calorie or $30 mistake than a 3,000-calorie or $300 one." 

4. One day later Keep up the positive self-talk, and you'll be less likely to fall into the same trap again. "Self-compassion means not calling it a slipup but a detour. Say, 'Even if I'm meeting my goals only two-thirds of every day or week, that's two-thirds more than before.' Look at what you've done and frame it as an on-the-whole success." 

5. Two weeks later So you've "detoured" not just once but several times? Totally normal. "Accept failure as part of the learning process, but notice how you're failing. Focus on how long it takes you to rally after a mistake. If, for instance, your goal is to stop shopping and you slipped and splurged at the mall, see how quickly you can short-circuit feeling bad and move on. You'll know you're making progress if your recovery time continues to shrink." 

Rule 5: Bad Habits? They're Actually Solutions

When you understand how your vices help you, you'll have a better shot at kicking them to the curb. 

Admit it: You drink at least two cans of Diet Coke a day. Or like 28 percent of Americans, you hit the drive-through once a week. Or like roughly 16 percent of women, you still smoke. You know you shouldn't, but the real reason you can't stop yourself may be because you haven't admitted that these "bad" habits are actually solutions instead of problems, says executive coach Deborah Grayson Riegel, author of Oy Vey! Isn't a Strategy: 25 Solutions for Personal and Professional Success. Don't think your habit could possibly be doing you any favors? Grayson Riegel begs to differ: Diet Coke provides energy when you're tired; fast food saves time when you're too overscheduled to plan, prepare, and cook a meal; cigarettes give you a feeling of belonging to a community, a me-time break from work or a sense of rebelliousness. Once you've identified the problem your vice is solving, give yourself some credit: There's no question that you have the power to troubleshoot your own problems. Then ask yourself, "What would I be capable of if I used my conscious mind to develop a new, healthier strategy?" "You'll be far more successful if you can replace the original action with something that gets you the same reward," says Alexandra Jamieson, holistic health counselor and author of Women, Food, and Desire: Embrace Your Cravings, Make Peace with Food, Reclaim Your Body. "Try transforming a habit by substituting something else enjoyable: If ice cream is your go-to comfort food, try taking a bath with a few drops of grapefruit essential oil, which is still sensory," says Jamieson. "If you'd normally swing by the drive-through after a bad day at work, try stopping at a stationery store if that's your thing and buy a cute card. You still have the problem of wanting to feel comforted, but now you have solutions in place that aren't bad for you, making them guilt-free and far more sustainable." — Sarah Z. Wexler

Rule 6: You Can Make Your Cravings Work for You

There's no shortage of experts who can tell you all the ways to eat healthier (stock up on kale! drink green juice! pack your lunch every day!). sure, the advice works in theory, but what happens when life intervenes? Find out which things that you really like that are also healthy and go for those things.

Rule 7: Resolutions Can Be Small and Fun!

Yes, this can be the year you finally give up sweets or master the headstand in yoga or get a new job. But why can't it also be the year you read more books, laugh daily and daydream freely? These habits belong on everyone's list. 

Daydream More   When your mind wanders, you might want to follow it. Research from the University of Wisconsin-Madison suggests that daydreamers tend to have better working memories—and a separate study found that people whose thoughts drifted when they took a work break were more inventive when they returned to a creative project (listing possible uses for objects like a brick) than those who tried to stay focused during their break time. 

Watch Crazy Car (or Cute Baby) Videos   Science continues to show how beneficial laughter can be. You already know it can defuse anger and anxiety, but a study last spring also discovered it could reduce short-term memory loss in older adults. (When we're stressed, we release more cortisol, which, over time, may impair memory. Laughter, on the other hand, can decrease levels of the hormone.) Join a Book Club   In 2013, 23 percent of American adults didn't read a single book. That's too bad, as science shows that getting lost in a page- turner can do your body good. Marketing research by Mindlab International found that reading could lower stress levels up to 68 percent—and was shown to be a more calming activity than listening to music. 

Just Say Hello    Research has shown that people with stronger ties to friends, family, and coworkers have a 50 percent greater chance of outliving those with fewer relationships. Vow to reach out, whether it's to an old friend or a stranger you regularly pass on your way to work. It could be the easiest thing you do for your health all day. — Arianna Davis

Rule 8: Tech Is Your Friend

Consider these apps your 24-hour support system.

Join the Anti-Gym There's no time to exercise. The gym's too far. Workout classes are too expensive. Push pause on those excuses and download Nike+ Training Club, a free app that offers 15-, 30-, and 45-minute full- body workouts—with instructional videos for every move—that you can do in your living room (some require dumbbells). And their four-week exercise programs offer an experience closer to personal training. Choose the month-long plan that most matches your fitness level and goals. Get Centered Meditation is powerful stuff—it may help quell stress, lower blood pressure and reduce insomnia—but trying to quiet your mind during a harried day can be a tall order. Headspace, an app co-created and narrated by an ordained Tibetan Buddhist monk, will help get you started with ten free easy-to-follow tutorials that require only ten minutes of your time. At the end of the trial, you can sign up for a monthly ($13) or yearlong ($96) subscription to more sessions. Butt Out If a stick of nicotine gum isn't quite enough for you, find support on MyQuit Coach, a free app developed by LiveStrong.com that has been reviewed by medical professionals, including smoking cessation and tobacco addiction specialists. The program allows you to connect with other smokers trying to stop, track cravings and devise a quitting plan with short- and long-term goals. Count Calories Research shows that many people underestimate how much they eat (one report found that adults lowball what they've consumed at fast food restaurants by roughly 175 calories). And while it's easy to get stats from a nutrition label, can you accurately gauge the calories in a bowl of chips or a square of lasagna? Leave the number crunching to Countertop, a free app that pairs with a food scale ($150) to calculate the calories on your plate.   

 — Sarah Meyer

Rule 9: You Still Have to Write Down Your Resolutions!

People who commit their goals to paper are more likely to follow through, according to a Dominican University of California study. So pick up your pen and start plotting your best year yet.

From the January 2015 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine 

  

Qatar

Here I am in Doha, waiting for the next long leg of my trip back home from India. I left last night from SwaSwara at 10 p.m. for the bumpy three hour ride to Goa.

On the plane, some poor soul was stretched out on the floor in the back of the cabin getting oxygen, another stewardess was fanning another sick looking guest. Good that the rest of the passengers were sleeping.

Now it is 6 Qatar time. Crossing over all these time zones makes it hard to keep up. I just know I missed a night of sleep. 

After eating an ayerveda diet for two weeks, I'm really careful about what I eat on the trip back. Which means I had one bite of an omlet on the plane. 

Establishing rituals for positive change

Rituals

Change is often difficult. Self-discipline is usually insufficient when it comes to fulfilling our commitments, even those that are good for us - which is why New Year's resolutions often fail.

Instead of focusing on cultivating self-discipline as a means toward change, you might introduce rituals. Building rituals requires defining very precise behaviors and performing them at very specific times.

Be it meditating after waking, walking daily, a weekly special date with your partner, you need to form rituals around them. 

What rituals would make you happier and healthier?

What would you like to introduce to your life?

Introduce no more than one or two rituals at a time, and make sure they become habits before you introduce new ones. 

Incremental change is better than ambitious failure.